I recently had an awful experience with a woman who claims to be an energy healer, psychic, and clairvoyant. My session with this woman left me feeling annoyed, convinced that I will never use her services again. I’m compelled to write about this so that you can avoid toxic spiritual practitioners and know you’re not alone if you’ve had similar experiences.

I used this woman’s services previously for help with my anxiety, but it had been about seven years since our last session. As you already know from my blog, Toxic Therapy, I also discontinued my client relationship with a toxic therapist seven years ago too. These seven years allowed me to hear my own voice again and helped provide clarity about these dysfunctional and toxic “professionals.” 

After the holidays, this woman offered some discounted sessions. Normally I would have completely disregarded her email, but this time I felt like a one-hour session receiving messages from my spiritual guides would be a nice treat. However, my session with this woman showcased her lack of professionalism and subsequently highlighted how much my self-trust had grown.

There was a part of me that wanted to believe everything this woman said. But I made a vow to myself during these past seven years, as the fog has lifted and my vision has become clearer, that I only want to see the truth no matter how hard the truth is. The harsh truth is that my time and money were mostly wasted with this woman’s version of spiritual support. And I use the word “mostly” because this session reminded me that there needs to be more honest conversations about toxic “support” even in the spiritual realm.

Below are the five biggest takeaways I garnered from my last and final session with this toxic spiritual practitioner.

1.     They NEVER undermine your own personal relationship with the Divine.

You have your own personal relationship with God/the Divine/the angels, however and whoever you connect with spiritually. Everyone has their own personal connection to the divine through prayer, meditation, and intuition just to name a few. You don’t have to go through any person, organization, or institution to be spiritual.

There is currency in making you feel small, less than, unworthy, and invalidated and this currency feeds people’s egos and bank accounts, including some people who work in the spiritual realm. It’s perfectly fine to seek out spiritual guidance, especially if you’re going through a tough time, as long as this support doesn’t undermine your own spiritual connection. Whomever you go to for spiritual guidance should fully support your own spirituality and spiritual gifts.

2.     They surrender the support sessions to the Divine.

During my support session, things felt forced. Early on, this woman expressed frustration with her guides for not giving her messages fast enough. That in itself was a warning sign for me, because having personally completed a three-year intensive study of the angels, archangels, and ascended masters, I know that these things cannot be rushed. Getting frustrated with spirit guides because divine messages aren’t coming through fast enough will block that connection.

During the rest of the session, there wasn’t a natural flow and I quickly realized that it wasn’t her guides or my guides delivering messages – it was her ego. Your spiritual practitioner’s job is to hold sacred space for you and to let things unfold naturally. Surrendering is a key component to having a relationship with the divine. That’s why it’s called faith.

3.     Your sessions are about you.

Before my session officially began, this spiritual practitioner and I spent some time catching up about what we had both been up to these past seven years. She shared her ideals about the world, some of which I agree with. Later, during the session, she became fixated on a business idea I had brought up. I just wanted to know where to start, but, instead, she spent an hour talking about my business idea and incorporating her ideals into it, saying it was guidance from the guides. When I spoke up and said I wanted to talk about other things, such as my current book and some other book ideas, she quickly dismissed me saying the guides really wanted to talk about my business idea.

You are paying for the session, therefore you have a say in what type of guidance or healing you receive. Some practitioners forget this and hijack their sessions, steering it in the direction they want it to go.

4.     They encourage your personal growth, gifts, and talents.

After eventually sharing my book ideas with the spiritual practitioner, she told me that the guides said they would never be best sellers. This was again her ego taking over because in my own personal relationship with the divine, I’ve never known God or the angels to be concerned about things like best seller lists. Only the ego holds onto these things.  She was projecting her own ideals and obsessions about money and power onto me, assuming that I’m driven by the same objectives as she is. I wanted guidance for my personal growth (which writing is part of), not tips on how to get rich quick or feed my ego.

Having anxiety has taught me that my soul is screaming to be seen and heard. The projects I work on are expressions of my soul, which is helping me heal anxiety. Every part of you needs to be validated to heal anxiety—your experiences, your feelings, and your soul expressions. Any spiritual practitioner who downplays your gifts and deems your talents worthy only if they generate money and/or popularity lacks professionalism and spiritual insight.

5.     They are comfortable with you in your power.

It's been my experience that some women feel a strong need to knock other women down. It’s upsetting and has got to end. These women are letting their egos run the show with a scarcity mindset, believing there are limited resources and opportunities available. When you’re achieving your goals, it activates this kind of person because they feel you’re taking opportunities from them. And every time they encounter another woman deeply grounded in her own power, they feel threatened because it’s a reminder that their power stems from their ego, which really isn’t power. It’s their fear.

During my session I told this woman I had a strong connection with Gaia, the earth (we all do!). Knowing I’m part Hispanic, she told me that Gaia called me Gaiaete (really???) and how Gaia tried to help me contain me light so that I won’t shine too bright here on earth (again, really???). But she’s wrong because hiding my light was another contributing factor worsening my anxiety, whereas allowing my light to shine and unapologetically expressing myself has been incredibly therapeutic.

“You have a unique, brilliant light that deserves to shine brightly. Your beautiful light is desperately needed and is part of God’s divine plan.” – Tricia Easter, from my book Bold Trust – 6 Steps to Unravel the Long-Term Effects of Gaslighting, Unapologetically Trust Yourself, and Heal Anxiety

Overall, my session with this spiritual practitioner felt abrasive, aggressive, and intrusive. Support from a spiritual practitioner should feel soft and comfortable, so that your nervous system can heal. Spirit is all about unconditional love. The angels I’ve studied want to lift us up, not tear us down, and spiritual practitioners should follow suit.

If you have had a similar experience, please share in the comments section if you are comfortable talking about it. Whether or not you’ve had a similar experience, trust yourself and trust your own spiritual connection.

Look for my book Bold Trust – 6 Steps to Unravel the Long-Term Effects of Gaslighting, Unapologetically Trust Yourself, and Heal Anxiety which will be available this spring/summer.